19February2007
Where I’ve Been, What I’ve Lost, How Much I Have Gained
A story of love, loss, kindness, healing and an update from Stella on what's coming next.
Well, it certainly has been a while since I’ve had a chance to sit and write. Our holiday season was busy, chaotic and tons of fun! It’s always great helping people find just the right something for that special person in their lives.
Immediately following the holidays, I had major surgery. All is great – I just had a really long recuperation period. There were so many of you who sent well wishes and thoughts and prayers. There are no words big enough to express my gratitude to each of you.
I am now slowly getting myself back in the groove…
And, as I began to plan my return to a limited schedule in our brick and mortar store, a dear woman in my life passed away.
I think we all have that one person in our life that was there for us at a defining moment in our lives. Usually, this person is completely unaware of the impact they had on our life.
This was my Aunt Phyllis. I won’t bore you all with stories and memories, which are really only important to me. However, what I realized with her passing (and that of my Uncle Jimmy back in May) is that we are all made up of bits and pieces of people we meet along life’s path.
I have been blessed, beyond measure, to have been loved by some pretty fantastic people. I am who I am because of the kindness and generosity extended to me. I learned how to give and to love and to share by those who never, ever hesitated to do the same for me.
My uncle (from my mother’s side) and my aunt (from my father’s side) could not have been any more different – or any more alike.
My Uncle Jimmy was a simple guy. He worked with his hands. He was a volunteer firefighter. He was a “jack of all trades”. On any given day, you would find him fixing a leak in the roof or building a deck or constructing a shed. His tastes were simple: a good pair of work boots, a pair of jeans and a cold Budweiser. He loved his family and friends.
My Aunt Phyllis was the classiest lady I ever knew. She was beautiful and elegant and, even in a bathrobe and slippers, looked like she just walked on the set of the show Dynasty. She worked with her hands as well – creating art and beauty. Her tastes were more expensive: beautiful clothing, a good manicure and her love of gourmet tea, long before it was fashionable and chic. She loved her family and friends.
While so different on the surface, inside they were exactly the same. Their home was your home. Their food was your food. You needed a ride – they’d hand you their keys or take you there themselves. Clothes? Off their back. Love? Unconditional. Cost? Nothing.
They loved unconditionally. They gave freely. They never asked questions. They never held grudges. They were two of the best people I have ever, ever known. And, as I cried endless tears over losing them – I realized, just the other day, I never really did. They helped to make me into the person I am today. I am who I am because of their influence. A little piece of each of these two very different, yet completely similar people resides inside me. They will always continue to influence the person that I am and the person I will become.
When I grow up, I want to be just like them.
I am slowly getting back to work. I have found it exhausting to do even the simplest task. But, I am determined to get back into it! We have some fantastic new lines coming into the store – a gorgeous line of journals and greeting cards, one of the most sensational garden lines I’ve seen to date and a fabulously whimsical inspirational line that is sure to please everyone and every budget!
My ever-so-cool son, Bryan, is planning a line of his own clothing which will, hopefully, debut in our store by the end of the summer (his dad and I are oooh so proud)!! He is also going to be featured on a talk radio show about his experience in Africa (one he hopes to repeat very soon). Bryan has been holding down the “fort” for me while I’ve been recuperating.
I did manage to sneak into NYC for an evening to see my cousin Lina’s concert – Just FAB!!! As many of you know, I sell her CDs in my store – seriously – she is just amazing. Be sure to check out her website: www.koutrakos.com. You won’t be disappointed!
Well – it’s time to get back to work! I hope to write a little more often and get myself, my store and my website caught up ASAP!
Be giving. Open your heart. Don’t wait until it’s too late to tell someone what they mean to you. Until next time…
Pay it forward,
Stella
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24October2006
Paying it Forward, Jerks and Karma
A lesson learned from a boy leaving for Ghana, a cellphone lost in a parking lot and a bully who failed to ruin the day.
A couple of weeks ago I got into a ridiculous conversation with a business associate. He, a bully with an attitude, must have woken up on the wrong side of the bed and decided that I was to be his victim that day.
He insulted me, my business, my lifestyle, my family and just about everything that means anything to me. Believe it or not, I've never even met this person. Initially, I tried to have a reasonable conversation, not realizing that an agenda had already been set and nothing I could do was going to interfere with that.
I decided to let the bully get the last word. I made it clear that I would no longer respond because, quite frankly, it was an absolute waste of my time, he was just enjoying the game, nothing productive was taking place and it was taking precious time away from my son, who was leaving to go to Africa for two months.
I moved on, let it go, although the ugliness of the conversation took a few days to wile away...
During this same time frame, my oldest son was preparing to leave for a two-month journey to Ghana, West Africa. There, this young man I am so proud to call my son, will help villages create, nurture and maintain eco-tourism businesses. Helping him prepare to leave for a village without running water, basic communications and lackluster medical care was a challenge. During this chaotic time I somehow managed to lose my cell phone.
I couldn't get the song, "Bad Day" out of my head. My son was leaving, I had to deal with a jerk and now I lost my cellphone, which I just knew was going to be huge problem. And then, the cherry on top, my son lost his wallet (with his ATM card, ID, cash, etc., etc., etc.) while out with friends.
I called and cancelled my phone. Got Bryan ready for his amazing trip. I simply decided to suck it up and let it go. We canceled the cards, ordered new ones. We made do.
Hours before Bryan left, one of his friends called to tell him that another friend had found the wallet and put it in safe place. Yeah! That was miracle number one.
We got Bryan off to Africa, things slowly became normal again (why is it when people pack to go anywhere they leave a HUGE mess in their wake?) and I got back to work.
And then, a second miracle happened.
I called my cellphone to check my voice mail messages. On there was a message from the Verizon store at the Smithhaven Mall. Someone had turned my phone in.
Seriously.
Someone had found it in the parking lot at Borders or Macy's (the only two places I could have lost it) and went all the way to the Verizon store. This person walked in, found a sales rep and said, "I found this in a parking lot, hopefully you can find the owner." They left. They paid it forward.
And, I received karma. Really, really good karma.
All those times I took that extra step. Went that extra mile. Practiced what I preach.
And, the person who did this didn't even leave a name.
I thank them. Not for the phone - but for making my day. For making me realize that there is always more good than bad, more kind than bully , more gentle than jerk. A simple gesture - the fact that someone went out of their way for a stranger - me. Wow. Thanks.
I went home that night and woke the next morning to find an email from my son. He loves Africa. He's taught the villagers how to play American Football. They love it!
Life is good. Family is everything. Karma is grand.
Pay it forward,
Stella |
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Holy Communion |
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Soul Soup
Inspirational Poems | Chai
Maintenance ! |
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